Kennedy is No Longer Respunsible

By Desir Lusti, Claritin Staff

As of this quarter, Kennedy students and staff can no longer say puns on campus. It was recently announced this banning occurred as a result of the “sheer number of puns overwhelming the campus” as stated by the principal.

When told of the news, Kat Smeeyao, class of 2019, exclaimed, “You have got to be kitten me!” Smeeyao was the president of Kennedy’s former Pun Club and has been the four-time winner of the Annual Pun Competition held every spring. After the rules had been enacted, the club had been forced to close down.

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On April 1, Kat Smeeyao entered Kennedy H.S. Principal’s office in an effort to protest the new rules about puns. Claritin Staff photo by B-Daddy Harumph

There have been some who are supportive of this change as seen in swim coach, Mr. Marlin Grunion, stating, “The school is going in a good direction as it seemed admin was floundering a bit before.”

English teacher, Mr. Ivan Reedin, has taken note of the change in students and teachers after the rules had started being enforced. “The motivation in teachers to implement the rules has been a little paper thin,” added Reedin, “There’s been a lot of confusion and double-talk.”

Administration has further released the official statement: “We will no longer tolerate the use of puns on the campus of John F. Kennedy High School. If students continue to disobey the new rules, we will be forced to administer punishments matching the extent of the misbehavior.

Consequences may include, but aren’t limited to detention, ambiguous referrals, explaining serious literary jokes, lessons in witticism, and possible suspension.

Freshmen counselor Cole Flint gravelly commented, “Though the district has gone through major changes before, these changes seem a bit bolder. However, they might not be set in stone.”

Though it may be possible the rules will be reversed in the future, it seems that Kennedy will permanently be a campus without puns as of now.


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