Kennedy is No Longer Respunsible
By Desir Lusti, Claritin Staff As of this quarter, Kennedy students and staff can no longer say puns on campus. It was recently announced this banning occurred as a result […]
And the Band Played on, Discrimination in the M Wing.
By Chuck & Nancy, Claritin Staff Chancellor Nan Vatten recently called a schoolwide emergency this past week. “Tonight, I am speaking to you because there is a growing humanitarian and […]
Band, Project Move Banned from Rallies
Tou Geytoh, Chief Cynicist Performing members from the John F. Kennedy drumline, color guard, brass band, and Vibe in Promo were denied by student government rally planners after all four […]
Senior Trip to Disney Cancelled, Replaced by Zoo By Keir Joy
By Keir Joy, Happiness Consumer Unfortunately, this year, the senior trip to Disneyland has been canceled in lieu of a field trip to the zoo. Coming from a mix of […]
Waving Goodbye to the surf team
By Karissa Jones, Claritin Staff The Kennedy surf team has had a terrible year so far this season. For the first time since the drought of 2016, the team of […]
Time Capsule Reveals Signs of a Simpler Time
By Brett To, HIs/her/They/It-storian Kennedy administration made the long-awaited decision to open the historic time capsule located in Office Manager Maria Valim’s office. The 2006 treasure chest’s contents pleasantly surprised […]
Senior Trip to Disney Cancelled, Replaced by Zoo
By Keir Joy, Happiness Consumer Unfortunately, this year, the senior trip to Disneyland has been canceled in lieu of a field trip to the zoo. Coming from a mix of […]
School: “Our best course of action to punish students who miss class is to have them miss class.”
By Dean Tensean, Traffic Reporter School administration announced new policy in an effort to combat the dramatic increase of student truancy and tardiness. “We gotta crack down on these heathens,” […]
An Unfortunate Turn of Events
By Koa Kinsbad, Food Critic After being served an undercooked piece of exotic Bulgarian steak by Aima Wakow, junior at Kennedy and culinary student, celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay demanded the […]
“Abrakadabra, Magic Club Gone?”
By DeeDee Lou Shanelle, Campus Visionary At Kennedy, students with an interest in fooling an audience with optical illusions, sleight of hand, and clever card tricks, the Kennedy Magic Club […]
A Student was Abducted by Aliens
By Aryanna Zavala, Copy Editor On April 20, 2018, Aileen Martin, a student at John F. Kennedy High School, claims to have been abducted by extraterrestrials and experimented on. The […]
Spaghetti Strap-Clad Students Claim Second Amendment “Right to Bare Arms”
By Topher Rong, Italian Noodle Expert Thursday, March 30th, students protested the district’s ban on spaghetti straps, claiming that the Second Amendment guarantees the “right to bare arms.” In the […]
Speaking of a Change
By Jim Polca, Political Animal Control Expert The Speaker of the House of Representatives, Paul Ryan, does a heavy workout every week with his P90x routine. He does his 90 day […]
McClatchy Quiets the Lion by ‘Soft-Petaling’ a New Mascot
By Billie Rae Bisepp, Disciple of All Living Things Since C.K. McClatchy High School’s opening in 1937, the school has featured the lion as their mascot. Earlier this week, the […]
